The beliefs and practices of the members of the
Corinthian church seem to vary when it comes to matters of
immorality. In chapter 5, Paul rebukes the church at Corinth
for failing to exercise church discipline on a man living in
an incestuous relationship with his father’s wife. In the
second half of chapter 6 verses 12-20, Paul confronts those
who feel that having sex with a prostitute is not contrary
or detrimental to one’s spiritual life. There are those in
Corinth whose immorality shocked even the pagan Corinthians
(5:1).
The Corinthian Christians lived in a very troubled world,
not unlike the world of our own day. The ancient world of
Paul’s day had a distorted view of morality and life. We
know from Paul’s words in chapter 5 when a man in the church
was living with his father’s wife, the church did not
exercise church discipline. When Paul raises the issue of
sex and marriage in chapter 7, he is dealing with the
opposite extreme in the church, those who have overreacted
to fleshly lusts, seeking to overcome them by rigorous
self-discipline and self-denial. These men are just as proud
of their self-discipline and self-denial as the others named
in chapter 5 are of their fleshly indulgence. Perhaps they
assume Paul will applaud them. Paul’s response to their
letter will not be what they expected or what they want to
hear.
When Paul says, “It is good for a man not to touch a woman”
he is probably repeating the position held by the Corinthian
ascetics. This was their slogan. Paul repeats the statement,
not because he agrees with it in its entirety, but because
he agrees with it in part.
In verses 2-5, Paul does not stress the submission of the
wife to her husband as though it is his role to get pleasure
from his wife, and her role to give pleasure to her husband.
There is mutual submission.
Those who were advocating abstinence within the bonds of
matrimony are wrong. Abstinence in within the bonds of
marriage is unnatural. A healthy and pleasurable sex life
between a husband and wife is a normal and natural release
of sexual tension, and thus it is helpful in the prevention
of sexual immorality. However, this is not a guarantee that
there will be marital fidelity. If one mate is unfaithful to
the other, it does not necessarily mean that the offended
spouse has failed to satisfy the other. The lusting eye is
never satisfied. Nevertheless, Paul speaks of sexual
relations in marriage as a preventative for sexual
immorality outside of marriage. To abstain from marital sex
proves to be a temptation; to enjoy marital sex promotes
edification. Frustratingly unfulfilling sex to one partner
or the other will also tempt one to be immoral. The “use me”
mindset in sexual intimacy falls far short of the mark that
Paul sets for us. The duty of the husband is to satisfy his
wife sexually, just as the duty of the wife is to satisfy
her husband. This is the best one can do to stay sexually
pure and to encourage one’s mate to do likewise. There is
nothing spiritual about avoiding sex. There is nothing
spiritual about demanding sex.
Paul’s command to “Stop depriving one another” in verse five
strongly implies that a number of Corinthian Christians are
already withholding sex from their mates. Paul tells us that
withholding sex from your mate is sin, a sin that must be
corrected by obeying our Lord’s command through Paul.
In this letter, Paul sets down some very stringent
requirements regarding the cessation of normal sexual
relations in marriage. First, there must be a mutual
agreement by the husband and the wife. There must not be a
unilateral decision made by one spouse. Second, a cessation
of normal sexual relations should only take place for
matters of great urgency and resumed as quickly as possible
so that Satan may not take advantage of a lack of
self-control. This statement should have really irritated
the Corinthian ascetics, who thought of their sexual
abstinence as the epitome of self-control, according to Paul
sexual abstinence did not strengthen these men in their
battle with the flesh and with Satan; it weakened them, and
it made them vulnerable.
In verse 6-9, Paul clarifies the circumstances in which
celibacy could serve a beneficial purpose, first, when
celibacy contributes to the cause of Christ. Paul indicates
this in his “wish” that all men were as he. It is clear that
Paul simply desires that men might be free from distractions
in order to devote themselves to serving God. The ascetics
seem to have imposed their view of spirituality upon others
in the church. Paul does not represent his preference as a
biblical imperative, but as a personal preference. Unlike
many of us, Paul carefully distinguishes between those
commands that are from Christ that men must obey and the
counsel he offers which men can disregard. When Paul
indicates that a certain view or preference of his is not by
divine revelation, and therefore not binding on his readers,
he is demonstrating personal integrity by not trying to give
the impression that his desires are God’s desires. By doing
so, he also underscores the fact that the rest of the
Scriptures are inspired and authoritative.
The Corinthian celibates surely thought of themselves as
more spiritual and were proud of their celibacy. They looked
down on those who were married. However, many singles today
who know Jesus Christ as Savior are not serving God with the
intensity and focus of some who are married and have
families. Celibacy is not a spiritual gift it is related to
one’s gift and calling. If one were to conclude that there
was such a thing as “the gift of celibacy,” it would have to
be from this passage, and this passage does not compel one
to reach this conclusion.
In the Bible, there are several texts where enumerating of
spiritual gifts occur, in none of these texts is celibacy
listed as a spiritual gift. In verse seven, Paul does not
call celibacy a gift. If celibacy were a gift, it differs
from all the other gifts. Every gift enumerated has a
special function. The gift of teaching entails teaching. The
gift of exhortation entails exhorting. Exactly what does the
gift of celibacy do other than prevent one from having sex?
Celibacy is an added measure of self-control. How does the
absence of sexual desire minister to the body of Christ?
Staying single may be the calling of some. If it is your
calling, it is for the glory of God and for the promotion of
the gospel. However, the single life and sexual abstinence
is not the rule, as Paul knows.
In verses 6-16 Paul speaks from three different
perspectives, which the apostle clearly identifies, and
which we need to keep in mind as we attempt to interpret and
apply them. First, Paul speaks from his own personal
convictions and preference. In verses, six, and seven, Paul
begins by saying, “But this I say by way of confession, not
of command.” Paul’s wish is that all men might remain
single, like him, but he knows better. He does not speak
with apostolic authority; therefore, those who do not follow
the advice of Paul are not disobedient of a divine command.
In verses ten and eleven, Paul is simply reiterating Jesus’
teaching on divorce when he instructs both the Christian
husband and the Christian wife not to initiate divorce. In
verses twelve to sixteen, Paul is saying that his teaching
here is apostolic instruction, with full apostolic
authority. The difference, Jesus did not teach the subject
matter. Paul speaks for our Lord, but he is not repeating
instructions that the Lord gave His apostles while on earth.
The reason is quite simple. The Jews cannot conceive of a
mixed marriage, the marriage of a believer and an
unbeliever, or, at least, between a Jew and a Gentile. In
Jerusalem and the land of Israel, such a possibility would
sound incredible, so why would anyone teach those in a mixed
marriage about marriage? However, in Corinth, mixed
marriages are inevitable after Paul and others proclaim the
gospel. No doubt, most of these mixed marriages occurred
before one of the two unbelieving partners were saved after
the commitment of marriage was made.
With these thoughts in mind, let us listen carefully to Paul
to learn what he has to say about marriage and divorce. His
words are just as applicable to our own day as to his.
